Am I Old Enough To Have A Senior?

I just went yesterday and put in the order for my oldest daughters Senior pictures..
Ugh.

I have a Senior. When did she grow up? When people tell you that your kids grow up fast and to enjoy every moment, believe them. It doesn't seem like she has been on this earth for almost eighteen years. It just seems like yesterday.... (I wont go there, don't worry)

It has been a adventure watching her grow up. It has been interesting to see a child of yours develop friendships, and grow into a adult. Its also amazing that you cant control as much as you think you can. She has her own personality, her own beliefs, her own morals. I might have added to them in some way, but I don't know how.

She is herself.

She has been through ups and downs with friends. She has made sports teams and not. She has talked back to coaches when she shouldn't and held her tongue when she knew it was best. She has stood up for the things she believes, and stood beside friends who have made choices that she herself might not. She has become a young woman who I think has integrity and morals. Could I ask for more?

I'm sure there are things about my daughter that I do not know. I am also positive my own mother did not know everything about me until stories started slipping out over the years....it makes for great Christmas dinner conversation.

I don't think I have to know everything about her. I know what is important. I know I love her. I know I will be devastated when she leaves for college and will cry many tears. But...I also know that she is ready. She is a strong person who maybe has to actually lighten up just a little.

Being the oldest of three she has had to step into the mom shoes a couple of times over her eighteen years. She has set an example for her sisters who look up to her even if they say the hate each other. I think as the oldest you have a lot of responsibility that you don't even realize until you are older.

I wish I could go back and relive just a few days over of her childhood. Those years seem so far behind us. First days of school, cuddling when she was sick, and her endless humor when she was little...all the little comments that we rack our brains trying to remember.

I enjoy her as an adult now. I suppose that means that she has turned out well. I enjoy her coming home and talking to me late at night as she raids the refrigerator. I like hearing the stupid things her and her friends do or have done. I like remembering her and Katie having a donut hole, mouth stuffing contest on the beach in Chicago over the 4th of July......

I love the fact that she is who she is. She never tried to conform to anyone elses standards. She's dyed her hair, she pierced herself, she wants a tattoo when she turns eighteen....shes done fab at school, she has great friends and shes been an excellent friend in return. Could I ask for anything more than that.

The hair dye faded...but she had the experience...that's what has made her what she is today. A young woman,a strong woman, a loving daughter and someones best friend.

I will hate to see her move out of the house. I think it will take some getting used to not having to wait for the door to open sometime after midnight..(if I'm lucky) But Ill know that she is ready for what awaits her. I just hope the world is ready for her..she going to be awesome.